I am 67 years old.

I estimate that I’ve written over 1 million words in my lifetime. Yet, from my personal perspective, the above sentence is the strangest sentence I have ever written. There’s just no way that I am 67. 43 – alright. 49 even, I can live with, but where the hell did these 60’s come from?

Now, you have to understand this isn’t just coming from someone who doesn’t want to be 67. Nooo, it’s not that simple. I’ve worked very hard to NOT be whatever age I was supposed to be for the last 30 years. (Boy, is that last sentence convoluted. Tough to write and tough to read, I’ll bet.) Dedication, discipline, devotion, decades of hard work, all for that occasional remark, “You’re not really (insert age), are you?” Usually that came from some CDC employee right before annual evaluations, but it always seemed so sincere. In fact, my physical therapist working on my knee last month asked, “Are you sure you’re 67?” Genuinely amazed I believe, though, in truth, I was paying him at the time.

I have written previously, and others have written more eloquently, about what you lose as you age. I am certain that I will write about it more in the years to come, but today I want to think a bit about what you gain.

After you’ve lived for a few decades, you begin to develop what some call wisdom, but what I usually think of as perspective. Whatever name you wish to apply to these experiences, they are invaluable. You have personally experienced, or observed in the lives around you, an incalculable number of interactions and events and witnessed the outcomes of these situations so that even the most obtuse of us must gain knowledge and perspective from these experiences. If, after all this you are still a sentient being, you can then apply this perspective to the events in your current life. You know how situations develop. You also know what occurs when people react to those situations in multiple different ways. You know what is important and what can be easily ignored. You know all about the vagaries of life and the ineffectiveness of attempted control of the world around you. Guess what – that’s wisdom. That can be passed on, but just try to get someone younger than you to listen. Good luck with that.

Another thought I have once in awhile now that I’m old is that I should be able to articulate my philosophy of life. That’s a problem. I’m not sure I have a fully developed life philosophy. I should have one. I’ve read enough philosophy that I could easily steal one, but I’ve never felt that any of our revered philosophers knew what the hell they were talking about. Some insight certainly, but not enough to build a life on, in my opinion.

I believe that life is hard. Life can grind you down and, if given the chance, life will chew you up and leave you broken. But I also believe that your life is full of brightness and happiness in both large and small doses provided you leave yourself open to it and recognize those opportunities as you come upon them. I think that in any given day there are moments of joy that make your day-to-day existence worthwhile. I also believe in the uplifting nature of life’s big events and how the expectation and memory of those occasions make life worth living. I like to laugh and to make people around me laugh. Day-to-day laughter is miraculous. I remember family and friend events big and small from my entire life and those memories lift my spirits to this day. Yet, I am always aware of life’s darkness and know that some type of tragedy is heading towards me or the people for whom I care. That doesn’t make life bleak, it is just true. I focus on those bright spots, both the big ones and the little ones. Enjoy your music. Enjoy your books. Enjoy your movies, television, and plays. Enjoy your food. Enjoy the people around you. Life is hard, but it’s still good.

Be good. Be well.

Little boy sat down and started to cry

Old man passed by and asked him why

He said, “I can’t do what the big boys do.”

Old man sat down and he cried too.

C.J. Chenier

“Man Smart, Woman Smarter”